Spiders, Monkeys and Lizards and How They Help You Meditate

 

Reasons You Should be Meditating

 

Everyone tells you how good it is to meditate.  Even Netflix has a Guide to Meditation and tells you all the  scientific reasons that meditation is good for you.   And it is.  Meditation:

• ·      Reduces Stress
• ·      Controls Anxiety
• ·      Promotes Emotional Health
• ·      Enhances Self-Awareness
• ·      Lengthens Attention Span
• ·      Reduces Age-Related  Memory Loss
• ·      Improves Sleep
• ·      Helps Control Pain
• ·      Decreases Blood Pressure

But…it doesn’t help if you can’t figure out how to get to that state of bliss and clarity.  And I tried and tried.  I started yoga  and actually dreaded savasana because I felt so out of place.  I kept have the same thoughts running  through my  mind—what am I missing here?  Why can’t I get this?

 

All the Many  Ways to Reach Zen-Ness

 

So, if you are like me,  you researched  the different types of meditation because maybe you just  need to try a different one and then you’ll be able to be  a member  of the cool zen  club, right?.  I found out and looked into many different kinds of meditation, like:

• ·      Guided meditation
• ·      Calming meditation
• ·      Insight meditation
• ·      Focused attention meditation
• ·      Body Scan meditation
• ·      Visualization meditation
• ·      Loving kindness meditation
• ·      Zen meditation
• ·      Mantra meditation
• ·      Transcendental meditation
• ·      Yoga meditation
• ·      Qigong  meditation
• ·      Breath awareness meditation
• ·      Kundalini meditation

Blamed it on the Monkeys and Lizards

 

I tried several versions.  Okay—practically all of them.  But the same thing was happening.  I could not turn off my monkey brain.  Never heard of your monkey brain?  Well, here’s the a quick lesson--Our brains can be separated into 3 sections:  our reptile brain (lizard brain), our primate brain  (monkey brain) and  our mammal brain  (human brain).  

Briefly, our lizard brain is the oldest part of the brain and found at the base of the  brain.  It  is our reptilian brain that controls our most basic instincts like our fight, flight, flee  or freeze responses.  The second part is the monkey brain which controls more complex tasks and emotions.  The third part is the human brain which allows for logical, rational thoughts and is free of emotional thinking and allows for delayed gratification.  When we multi-task, we are using  our monkey brain.  The monkey brain becomes distracted easily and makes you unsettled, restless and confused.  

 

I found it so difficult to shut down my monkey brain and remain in the present.  I knew  it was something I wasn’t doing right.  So (because  I’m a lawyer and  a Type-A  personality) I did even more research.

 Tell me How to Meditate

 

I read books and downloaded several apps and tried and tried.  In  fact, I have linked several great ones that I suggest you try out.  I mean, I hope you are reading this  and think  to yourself—what the heck is wrong  with her?  This meditation thing is easy-peasy.  (I mean, I do hope that  but  I  would  also  be super envious if being mindful came so easily when  I’ve worked and worked at it).  Because for years, I’ve done exactly what I’m “supposed” to  do and my mediation practice  is haphazard  at best.  I’ve tried the following  tips:

• 
  ·      Find a quiet place
• ·      Meditation mats and cushions
• ·      Focus on my breath
• ·      Use guided mediations
• ·      Start with  only a  few minutes per  day
• ·      Try different types of meditation
• ·      Don’t judge yourself
• ·      Don’t worry about clearing your mind

 

It’s the last one there—don’t worry about clearing your mind that was my Achilles’ heel.  Because the more I tried to not worry, the more I worried.  It kept getting worse and worse.  I even went to a 2 day meditation seminar.  I loved it and it really was helpful  but….still, it was clear I was not getting it like everyone else in the room.  I had to “fake” it and pretend that I was now enlightened.

Spiderman and how I finally figured it out

 

For years,  I’ve done some form of “meditation” but it never stuck  because I was still floundering and either falling asleep or using that time to go over my to do list or just sit there and counting my breaths.  No enlightenment. No sweet spot.  Nada.  Until I watched Spiderman.  Yep—your friendly neighborhood spiderman.  It was that scene where Peter Parker first gets his spidey senses.  Where he is so in the moment  that he notices the flapping of the bee’s wings, that he can hear the paper airplane being thrown and notice the liquid on the floor ALL at the same  time.  It wasn’t that he shut ALL those things out  of his mind, it was the opposite—he took it ALL in and just registered them and was totally in  the moment.  (Lightbulb moment. Literally, enlightenment right here in a Marvel Comic.)  

 

Mediation (for me at least) can be that place not where I empty  my brain of all the distractions but  where I take it all in  and acknowledge it at  the same time.  (Holy crap, that’s powerful, right?!)  It is a place where you just be.  If you hear a noise, it’s not  a distraction it’s a super power.  If you feel a sensation, it’s not a  hinderance it’s an awareness.  If you have a thought, its not  an interruption it’s an insight.  So, for me, meditation is no longer scary or elusive.  As a type A personality, I can handle taking information in and listening to it.  It’s actually something I look forward to.  In my Pre-Dawn blog, I talk about just sitting in the quiet and listening to my house and all the noises before everyone gets up and how comforting it is.  Voila!  Meditation! And just like that—this Olympian multi-tasker with an ADHD monkey brain can enter the world of mindfulness.  Which means….yep, you knew this was coming--- so can you!

 

Look for my blog on meditation and quiet and how it helps us to be creative. Coming soon.

 

Allyson Brupbacher was born and raised in New Orleans until she enrolled and then graduated from University of Houston Law School in 1997.  She has been practicing family law for over 20 years.  She is board certified in family law and a licensed mediator. She has been practicing yoga for about 5 years and made a dream come true when she became a certified yoga instructor RYT 200 in June 2020.  She lives in Houston, Texas.  She describes herself as a lawyer, mother and badass but not necessarily in that order.  She also calls herself the yoga lawyer.  Her background provides a unique perspective to help parties in the middle of a divorce.  If you are in need of a divorce coach, contact her at www.coachingbyallyb.com or email at allyb@coachingbyallyb.com or follow her on Instagram  (@txyogalawyer, @yogalawyer1123, @coachingbyallyb, @texasdivorcecoach) Facebook (@txyogalawyer and @coachingbyallyb) and Twitter (@coachingbyallyb).  And visit her blog--https://coachingbyallyb.blogspot.com